couldn't imagine if it is real....dont really know that is pleasing....dont really know if he feels the same as the way he told me....dont even know if he really exist to the extend of liking me more than a friend. Cant imagine that...is he the right person...if the Lord agrees. but believe deeply that God would be the first to say...NO girl,  he is not the right guy.. do not be unequally yoked. Little gurl....believes in wht the bible says...but now it seems that little gurl finds it hard to juggle between being frens with the person that she likes and looking at him hurting for her. Little gurl cant stand those sweet words that he showered upon her. Godly brothers and sisters have tried to persuade little gurl to stay put unto the Biblical way of life. 

But little girl is finding very hard to know which is alrite to do and what is not alrite to do. Little girl pray and pray...and see if God would come and give help. little girl cant wait to see another world ahead for an adventure. It might be just an illusion now for the little gurl...wondering what would happen next. Feeling excited and afraid abt wht might happen...willl it be an alright thing to continue or is it a not so right thing to meddle upon. Little gurl cant sleep at night.

Little girl seemed calm but inside her, she is hurting deeply...and yet the Lord gives her encouragement to continue on in life. Little gurl felt betrayed by the person she likes sometimes. Wondering wht that person say is the truth. Little girl will never trust him anymore if he trick her anytime. Little girl just have to say farewell and forgive him once more. The lord is gracious to little girl...so most probably little girl will be gracious to the person who takes her for granted and use her as a tool. Being a servant is wht she feels like doing. but sometimes...there are still human limitation of self-righteous in her....

Sometimes...waiting for someone special to appear is hard...but little girl gaze in wonder about how god work in ways toward other Christians and how they survived in a good marriage. God gave them prefect fitted husbands that love and care for their own wife. Little girl is still struggling after knowing all these. Little girl although knowing that if anything would happen between them, she and her friend...it'll not last for long. But again little girl is tempted to do so because of her pure feelings of love and affections towards that particular person. There was nothing that the little girl can do. The person that says he liked her...doesnt show that he really cares much abt her...she is wondering if he really feels the same. There is nothing else...more than jst affection towards that person that she likes.

LIttle girl dun really feel it is right to scribble down in this journal....little do not know how to share it with others the anxiety...little gurl jst feels very silly and insecure....but thank God that He is always there to lift little girl up.... 

Most probably little girl might smile and laugh as days pass by...but little girl would not want to show how terrible her life is to slow down other ppl's activities in life. Little girl dun really want to share with others...because to her everybody has their ups and downs. Little girl just remain thoughtless of wht is happening now...little girl do not want to drag on the activity that is working in her head...little girl jst need to solve this problem as soon as possible so that she wont break down again. The more the little girl write...the more little girl feels fustrated with the person she has a heart for.

Looking at that person today....was like pretty cold...is like as if nothing happened yesterday and is like normal...just basically normal...sometimes made little girl wondered if he is really truthful with his words...little girl hates to know that she is played again...and she hates to know that she is being lied...little girl tries to bring herself to meet him, it took all the courage to walk to him, and sit beside him and talk to him but in the end he was busy...and not feeling very well. Little girl is trying to understand him...but she still cant...his words just contradicts his true self... there was nothing little girl can do...little girl do not want to push him futher...as if he is not the one...means he is not the one...

Little girl have to give him some time and give myself some time... both are busy with assignments lately.. Little girl is very afraid still..wondering wht he said was real...last nite...was it true or was it just a fake or was it just plainly using her...little doubted.

Little couldnt sleep last nite...wondering wht would happen the next morning...little...felt very down because ...she just rejected the offer of having a relationship with the person she likes...because of different faiths...little is still wondering if she made a mistakes and would like to settle the misconfusion of thoughts. little girl is still waiting...realize that she might burst out anytime soon.

but still little girl comforted herself in the Lord's presence. Little girl would try to meditate abt the love of God and let no other man mislead her direction towards the Holy God....nothing can seperate her from her love for God. No matter wht... Dear Lord, I put my trust in you...

thetruehutien

sometimes,i just feel i am same as you.......
before we meet the right person,we always meet tones of wrong persons.so that,we know how to treasure the right person.
sometimes,i just feel i am a person who never treasure the one who loved me deeply...by rejecting them....
somehow,i just being described as a person who is emotionless,heartless.....
but the person sure avoid you.....because everyone afraid being hurt...so that,they can forget you faster and start anew.
"tomorrow will be a new day."the chicken little said.
human are forgetful....
human is always change according to the environment...
however,Godfather will never change....
only the love of Godfather and agape love towards others is eternal.
between the eternal and the temporary...
we must make a choice...
somehow,the brothers in church are not the best choice too because you don't know how he will change in the future.(example from my family)
the world is spinning......
love is a gamble.....
you will never know,you will win or loss...
most of them loss.....

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