depressed.... i just have to blame myself for it. running away from problems and i couldnt solve it now. friends have tried their best to bring me bac kto college but i couldnt stand  pressure. they told me tht if i couldnt stand the pressure how could i continue on in future. Working life would be even worse. I know ...I'm actually afraid of every step tht i make now. I wish i dont exist in anyones life. I wish i wouldnt have made a decision to study further and watse my parents money.

I wish i wouldnt have think so much abt certain things that make me fail you badly... i wish that I would not stress myself so much in everyhing. I really wish that i still have friends. i never listen to what they say... i didnt want to listen to anyone. I wanted my own way. Who is to blame....me, myself and I. Why am i so selfish...why am i such a scaridy cat. I'm just confuse abt myself. No one with me. .. of course...who is to be blame again...? me.

I never learn a lesson...until is alrd too late...everything is in the drain i can never go back to college again. Me being a writer, me being a graduate and me being a advertiser is no longer there. Serve me right, i'm failure that dont deserve anything. I've wasted my parents hard earned money. I need to do something back for them.

I'm not a good testimony in life any longer. Is another part of life that i have to go through on my own. I must learn to be a responsible person. I'm not responsible enough...everything is too late  to look behind. I use too much of my feelings and it over power me all the time. usless me.

erm just want to let my friends that have been supportive to me in college during my stay...i wish them all the best in life. I truely enjoy their existence. They are those that have calm me most of the time. Stay by myside when i need a shoulder to cry on. and a share problems and etc etc. I'll miss a college life. but again...it was me who did this to myself...nobody wants this to happen...i've chose this path...i cant turn back. " nasi sudah jadi bubur."

thetruehutien

Dear sis,

Happend to just read your blog and discover your trouble. Yet I don't really know what have happend to you, mind to share with me?

Since I don't really know what happend to you, and it seems that your friends have failed to getting you back into "one piece"... I don't have any brialliant advice or solution for you too. But as a Christian, you know that there is a higher power way above the human perception and ability, God. Don't try to solve your problem with just your strength or from your friends' comfort, but just pray to Lord for his guidance, pray that he'll give you the strength and wisdom to carry on your path...eventually not your own path...but the narrow path that Lord has intended for every Christian...

You are not alone, you are surelynot the only one who feeling miserable and have tonnes of pressure and many unsolved problem...many people experienced it, many people have brace through it, though there are people failed to do so. But as a follower of Christ, we know that we have been given a new life... the life we having now is not about our own, but to shine the light of God unto the others, to love others as Jesus love us.

Just look at how mother Theresa carry her work...many people lying hopelessly and die in great numbers in front of her.. her colleague was too depressed to stand such phenomena but she is the only who still able to giving love and care to the patient; such is the spirit that we need to follow.

Sis, I'm writing this message not as a person of a great spirit...but like you too, I'm also suffering from my own problem in life, and still struggling in life. But the things is I'm still believe that to continue to be faithful in Christ, all these is just another history of my life and another means to mold me acording to Lord's will.

Stay still, sis. I'll pray for you as I hope you will pray for me too. God bless!

Liew Chun Yip

hey, am really worried about you! Can we talk about this the next time we msn?? Really want to know what happened?
Please don't think that you are a failure! You are definitely not, cuz u r God's creation which is perfect!You are not the only one who struggles with life, many have been through this n have rise up to be a stronger person. You can do that too!
Can't really say much here, but i juz 1 2 tell you that you can talk to me about anything.
My email is junshi14@yahoo.com. Feel free to email me n talk to me.
Will constantly pray for you sis!! Take care!!

hei, what happened?? i just knew that u quit... don't blame urself.. try to be stronger! i know u sure can overcome everything!! Gambattene!!!

Find rest my soul, in Christ alone.
Know His power, in quietness and trust.

The answer you're looking for is right in your song. However depressed you are, no matter how alone you feel, God is your Friend. He lifts you up during stormy times. And you are His precious child, there is no need to feel inferior, or like a bad testimony. Tomorrow is always a new day, the past is going to be forgotten...

Why am I discouraged? Why so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again-- my Savior and my God! Psalm 42:11

Take care.

Dun worry, ur friends won't leave you. at least i know i won't. Seriously, i'm really geram with you during that time. BUt i think u can understand that our geram is bcos we really care u. BTW, everything is ok now.
How r u lately? What r u doing? I don't know is it a good decision to frop your studies, however, the most important thing is u know what u wanna do now. I remember u said you'll like to be a photographer. Then take steps to achieve ur dream.
It's ur own life. Find ways to make ur life happier. Depressed is not the way. Cassie, no one can help u, even ur GOD, u can help urself.
GAMBATENE!!!

WISH U GOOD LUCK N HAPPY ALWAYS

Wish you good luck n happy always.:):)